It’s around 12:10 pm at my work in Quezon City, Philippines. Almost everyone was out getting their lunch. I myself was about to dig into my lunch when a woman came into my office. The moment I saw her, I knew exactly what she wanted from me.
She walked with a limp. The fingers on her right hand were all curled up and twisted into each other. Her shoulders and face were crooked, like she had a stroke or palsy. She approached me, and in a slurred speech, she asked if I can spare some change.
If I had a customer, I would have given this beggar either a one or five peso coin just so she won’t bother us. But this time, it was just me. So, I gave her my usual monologue: “Sorry. The owner is not here. I’m just the secretary. I barely earn enough and I have two kids in school.” It’s actually believable, because I don’t wear jewelry (except for tiny fake studs to keep my ear piercing from closing up). And though I’m the owner of the company, I often wear the company uniform – a cotton collared shirt with a small logo at front left. She left.
I had a feeling that she was not what she appeared to be. Her clothes were somewhat dirty, but they were well-pressed. My instincts were correct. A few minutes later, I caught a glimpse of her at the corner gas station. She was walking straight and tall! No trace of the disability she had a few minutes ago. It was like a scene out of the comedy movie “Trading Places”, where Eddie Murphy’s character, a blind and crippled beggar / con artist, regained his sight and was able to walk when he was about to be busted by cops for panhandling. “It’s a miracle!”
This was not the first time I’ve seen a “miracle”. There were four before this one. It was annoying to have been almost a victim of a con artist, but I have to admit it made my day. Sometimes, the best thing to do is to sit back, put humor into things, think of Eddie Murphy on “Trading Places”, laugh at life. I might never again experience this anywhere else.
P.S. Just as I was about to publish this post, another person approached my desk. He had a rosary around his neck. He claimed he was a faith healer, and he could help cure my dry skin. I said to him, “No, thank you. I don’t need it.” To which he replied, “Why? Don’t you believe in me?” Gotta love the Philippines.
A beggar comes in many forms, and begs with a collection of techniques.Some cultures cultivate beggars, and some condemn them. You must wonder, what culture would cultivate beggars? It is a culture who favors ‘free’ things. A culture whose practitioners are free-loaders. Deep love for ‘free stuff’, for ‘miracles’, and for ‘easy to acquire wealth’, that is it’s principle, the soil in which it’s many seeds are cultivated upon and grow to be gullible trees unable to bear their own fruit. Eagles, incapable of soaring on their own, for they were never taught to become independent by their mothers who called themselves a success, for they succeeded in succumbing to each impractical whim, each unnecessary craving, and each vanity her fledglings demanded from her. Spoiled fledglings. Spoiled very dependent fledglings who grew to become beggars. Rather than condemning beggars, this culture condemns the tight-fisted and hails philantrophies as gods. To their misfortune, reality shall invariably prevail. Reality, that nothing in this world is–Free. There is a North East Asian saying, “If you love free stuff, you’ll turn bald.” Their souls had turned bald.
A beggar is anyone, whose habit is begging, without any respect (manners), and genuine shame. If they beg with those two, they are not beggars because habits can’t be done with genuine shame. Now, as I have said, a beggar has a variety of begging techniques. A beggar when spoiled by his provider, would grant himself, at a point, vague entitlement to his provider’s property and would get a notion that he does not need to undergo any more ‘begging’,and hand it to himself instead. For some reason, his brain had somehow concluded that this act was totally, definitely, 100% not stealing. It is at times worse when the feeble mediocre provider and the spoiled dependent consumer are genetically related. Oh mother of mars, the entitlement thing becomes even more awful! It is after all, a beggar’s pride that he is not a thief (Japanese proverb).
This type of situation may vary, but here is one very common instance that I’m sure many of you will relate to instantly upon reading. A very dependent person getting all the credit, for spoiling an even more dependent person. Well, even if you couldn’t relate to it like I promised, you’re most likely just oblivious to it. It’s all over the country, you just have to be keen enough. Here’s a hint, look for a ‘generous’ Santa and find out where he gets his presents, just to realize that he is also a panhandler!
The reason we love to watch movies with the same immortal plot of unfortunate people becoming spontaneously successful is because truly this does not happen often. We go to the movies to take a sweet break from reality by immersing ourselves in what’s not. Such as that beautiful but impoverished ash-faced girl who received a letter saying that she’s actually an illegitimate daughter of a CEO of some big-time Company and he just died yesterday and she should take his throne. Wow! Instant wealth! They are stories of inheritance in particular. We love inheritance, because we’re not reminded of having to work hard to be rich and glorious. Heirs and heiress are a conventional role in the Soap Opera world believe it or not. But, how’s life for a real heir in Reality, training day after day to be qualified for his inheritance? Semi-ordinary and 90 percent manipulated. There’s one thing that’s true though, heirs are not spoiled. Heirs actually work very hard. Ever heard of ‘My parents are rich, but not me.’? Trust me, there’s 1 in 3 chance of that person being an heiress.
Most of us would deny this but it’s as true as the fact that life is unfair. Fate does have a huge part in determining our success. But that can be undermined by hard work which is under your control. Farmers from South China say “If a man works hard, the land won’t be lazy”. They don’t believe that it depends on the land whether the season will be fruitful or not, but on the farmers themselves. In other terms, they don’t believe it depends entirely on fate (i.e. genes, location on the social strata, environment) for one to be successful, but on how hard they work. Genes and class do have a big part in determining one’s success, as unfair as that may seem, but hard work has a bigger share. This is a Chinese principle and it is no wonder that the most successful people in the Philippines are Chinese when just a century ago they were the one of the most horribly treated minorities. See just how hard-work turned things around for them? I know it will for anyone with the same principle.
I thought freeloaders were confined on the step-boards of Jeepneys and the streets of Manila, but sadly, no. And that’s why I have concluded that it must be in our own culture. It is a Filipino trait, believe it or not. I find them in classrooms, at my grandparent’s overcrowded home, in the neighborhood and in church. Hands, sometimes even demanding rather than begging, asking something for free whether it’s load, toothpaste, homework, wan-hol, wan-hap, or wan-fort. To my surprise I’m even obligated to pay for something I thought was given out of generosity (they list it down and compute everything they’ve given to you out of ‘generosity’! Don’t fall for that trap!) I was never called stingy or ungenerous in America, but I am labeled one here. The most hurtful part about it is that, these people ask commandingly, or in other words, as if they’re entitled to whatever it is they’re asking for. They will follow you around as if you actually owe them something, and torment you by asking for money, if you don’t give them, then expect to be ostracized.
The Chinese in the country as well as the Ilocanos are known to be “kuripot” or stingy, because they know that money is the result of hard work and not something possessed by any of the following: pangungulit (through immensely annoying perseverance), pangungutang (asking for money), panglilimos (The annoying tone of “Penge.”), paglolotto, o pagsasali sa Wowowee, Eat Bulaga at ano mang kagaya nito (entering a game show). These people know what it means to work hard and it is no wonder that they are usually the most successful.
The worst thing any parent, whether they belong in the upper-class or the lower-class, can ever do to a child is to spoil them. To the parents reading this, you just have to let your child experience the spice of life occasionally. The best would be to tell him to save for the things he wants as you give him his weekly allowance. You can teach him how to compute percentages at an early age and let him know how to budget money. You should notice that I used the word ‘let’ instead of ‘teach’, he will learn to budget money by himself if you give him a large allowance and let him spend for certain things. Just a suggestion. Giving your children a huge allowance is actually good, just make sure to tell him that you’ll only strictly provide for his needs and as for the things he wants, he should provide for that 80% of the time. My parents take us to Disneyland, Yosemite Park, Grand Canyon, Universal Studios and it all costs themmoney, that’s the 20% I’m talking about. These are wants which you know is beyond reach for your kids. For instance, in Jollibee you provide him with 2-pcs Burgersteak and pineapple juice, but he wants a Choco Sundae too if he was raised like what I said above, naturally he would be taking out his wallet to give you 25 pesos and say ‘Gusto ko rin po ng Choco Sundae.’ He is taught that nothing is free and we have to work hard for the things we want. Even if he says ‘Six pesos lang naman eh.’ we should learn to say ‘No way kid.’ When my seven year-old cousin tells me ‘Six pesos lang naman eh.’ the picture of small malnourished street-children appears in my mind, so that’s what I say, ‘No way kid.’ I want him to grow up to be a money-generator not a beggar. He will learn the art of begging, not the art of making money. You must be faithful to this principle if you’re willing for it to become yours and if you want to see the promised outcome of that principle. You can give them something big by denying something small.
It is a part of this horrible world that there are people who would rather find a way to get things for free instead of working hard, and according to the rules of this world, it never works and we have the sorry state of the Philippines to prove it.
Generosity is good, but even that belongs to a proper place and needs to be done intelligently. I maybe unwilling to give my cousin six pesos, but if you knew me better you’d know that I’m planning to build a school for the street-children someday. That school will hopefully teach them to be independent. Much like teaching them how to fish, or to fly on their own. I don’t want to start a free-food program, that will teach them to be more dependent. Generosity misused can lead to spoiled people. Better be generous instead with knowledge, truth and opportunity of a better life.
If this country will keep tolerating freeloaders and keep giving dole-outs (spoil them) from hard-working taxpayers money, be branded ‘heneroso’ by the illiterate ‘masa’ and get a higher chance of being reelected, this country will never learn a very blunt fact of life that nothing is free, and they will happily lie under the apple tree and not work hard for the money. Good luck Philippines. Want a sure success instead of relying on your unpredictable ‘luck’? You just need one simple quote to tape on your bedroom or you living-room where you can always see it.
Photos Of beggars in the Philippines
